Why Your Kid Will Never Accept Your Facebook Friend Request

What did you have to do for your teenage son or daughter to accept your Facebook friend request or requests. Come on, fess up!

My husband's aunt did an unbelievably unjust act out of desperation - she bought his son an iPhone 4s just to accept her Facebook friend request. She got her wish and was happy...for awhile. After a month or so, her son - who updates his Facebook status every two hours - suddenly became inactive and focused on Twitter instead. Happy kid, miserable mom.

I wondered about my own fate. Could this happen to me? Could my son who I almost jumped out of the hospital window from pain during those 12 grueling hours of labor not befriend me out of embarrassment?

While this topic maybe a bit shallow to some, it actually has an underlying issue about parent-child relationship that will be of importance someday. But today, I will stand as counsel for all those kids who keep ignoring their parents Facebook friend requests. Kid's got a point (or points).

Drama Queen

The I-have-a-headache-plus-sad-face status every other day is a cause for concern. Get yourself checked. It is annoying and is clearly a sign of Histrionic Personality Disorder. Kids know that you're clearly begging for attention. "Look son, I got 18 likes!". Way to go! It means, 18 people like that you have a headache.

Sad face statuses are my favorite. Extra points for the teardrop. When a concerned friend (read: gossipmonger) comments, "What's wrong?", the mom immediately replies "I don't wanna talk about it". *flying expletives*

Tag, You're Not a Hit!

Uploading photos of Junior when he was 2 years old inside an inflatable pool naked is not cute. Tagging Junior in that photo is not cute. Tagging Junior and his girlfriend in that photo is sick.

Worse is when a college friend tags you in a photo where you're half naked and doing a beer bong. This is exactly the kind of situation that will get you and your son on The Dr. Phil Show. Your son will talk about how that one Facebook picture made him quit school, lived under a bridge with rats for three years before finding inner peace by going on a two week trip to Calcutta.

The Fibber Post

Your Facebook Status: "At the mall with my girls! Shopping time!"

Daughter heads over to the garage: "Mom! What are you talking about? You're doing laundry! God!"

I believe that this is the reason why Facebook added the location button. It was invented to make us lie less.

The My Son/Daughter is the Best Post

I definitely understand when you upload pictures of every achievement (medal, report cards, good behavior certificate, hotdog eating contest award) of your kid; the thing is, your child does not. You have a huge wall in your house waiting for that. Fill it up.

Internet Acronyms

Someone should make a law regarding the age limit for using internet acronyms. Adding WTF, ROFL, LMAO, FML in your posts when you're over 40 is too much.

It's not always about you. Our kids have their own reputation to protect. They have a life away from our eyes that we should respect. We have all been there. It's a phase. My boys act all lovey-dovey with me when we're at home but they project a different attitude when they're with their friends.

If Facebook existed during my college years, I would never add my parents even if they bribe me with a yacht. Kidding! Of course, I would!

Now that I'm more "mature" and have my own family, I would often include them in my Facebook statuses of gratitude and love. Unfortunately, they don't have Facebook accounts because they're both dead.

I'm guilty of almost all of the above, so this post doubles as a therapy for when my kids ignore my Facebook friend requests. I can live with that. The future doesn't look bright for Facebook anyway. Defense mechanism right there.

Thanks for viewing! 


  1. My daughter and I both decided to not be Facebook friends. That way I can be myself. I do have some spies on her through Facebook. She has a few of my friends that she forgot to "unfriend" so I can know what she's up to. Works like a charm

    Great post!


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